In other words, taking care of elders comes first, as payback for all they have done to raise you over the years.His wife, on the other hand, does not pay her parents anything. She feels that they don’t truly need the money, as they live in a home that’s seemingly paid for.I don’t know the exact amounts, but that’s what I’ve inferred. Who do you agree with here, the husband or the wife? My husband feel very responsible for his mother, he pays her rent every month. I’ve been having allot of problems with my husband over this and I don’t even know if I can take it anymore and now his making it even worse by helping out his siblings who want there first cars and again they all work but haven’t been taught how to be responsible and save they get paid by next day it’s all gone!That’s a significant enough amount for them, it would seem, and could be used to help with retirement savings or to help fund the kids college account. I don’t see how money can be spent to support others outside the core, immediate family unit, when those needs aren’t fully being met. Do you think that parents have a right to expect financial support from kids, as payback for all they have done throughout life? I am not saying he should not giver her something but everything feels responsible for. His excuse to me is that the reason I don’t give to my mother is because my parent are together and his mother does not have a husband. Yesterday my husband paid 00 out of his own pocket to help his sister get a car that she wanted and paid for her insurance a whole year!Reply Edward – I do think that in general, helping parents in need is honorable.
This isn’t something that they directly discuss with his wife, but they have instilled in him over the years – and probably growing up – that it’s his responsibility first and foremost to make sure his parents are financially taken care of.If someone dies, he pays for it and pay her rent, cable, con-ed while she is away and it spits me off. I think his parents are being unfair, but if it’s something they’ve instilled his whole life, there’s little hope of changing them.Sounds like a compromise is in order — perhaps he can give his parents some amount that his wife deems fair? I know this doesn’t help this couple, but for goodness sakes people need to talk over these sorts of things before marriage!It seems like the husband has know about this obligation his whole life so he really should have let her in so they could have compromised before the situation arose.In my culture children are not usually expected to take care of parents so if mine sprung that on me I wouldn’t be happy.